How Lucky We Are

Friday after work I got one of those amazing phone calls that really makes your day/your week/your month/your year. A. called to tell me he got a promotion! A promotion that he has deserved for a long time. Not only is he getting a promotion with a substantial pay raise, he is getting a retroactive promotion!  Meaning that, in one lump sum, he is getting what he would have earned had he gotten this promotion in July 2010!

When A. started with this company four years ago, he was a clerical assistant. Doing nothing more than stuffing envelopes. About a year and a half ago, he took on a new position. One that required a lot of responsibility and hard work, but he was never given the title or the pay that goes with that job. But A. is such a hard worker. He never plays hookey and it takes Herculean force to get him to take off when he is sick. He has a work ethic I have rarely seen. I knew he would eventually get his recognition.

I have been worrying about money lately. The time I spend tutoring usually wraps up in March/April, and I would not be able to tutor/or be earning any money when I start my internship in June. A. kept telling me it would be fine, it would be tight but fine. I'm a worry wart, and found it hard to believe him. But his raise amounts to what I pull in tutoring and a little more. How serendipitous is that?

We celebrated with A.'s coworkers at Hooter's of all places. A. had a beer and a shot. He never ever drinks, not even at our wedding. But I think he was egged on by the guys, and I told him to just go for it.  So he got pretty tipsy, and it was so out of character for him that it was hilarious. He is a happy drinker. The only huge difference I saw is that his normally tolerable cheesy jokes reached an impossible to laugh at cheesy level, and I had to drive home. I never drive home. Which you would have thought I was the tipsy one because for some odd reason I kept wanting to stop at green lights. Has anyone else ever done that? But honestly is was just nice to see him so happy and cutting loose a little.

In the car, I finally had some time alone with him. We were able to celebrate and make plans for the money, and I was able to tell him how truly proud I am of him. And all of sudden I just felt overwhelmed with how much I love him. And it just felt like my feelings for him could totally swallow me whole if that makes any sense of all. I get these feelings sometimes, and for some odd reason they are always in the car (I first realized I loved him in my car). And I didn't get that feeling because he is earning more money. It really isn't about the money. It is about the man that he is. The security he gives me.

It is no secret that I come from a family of bad men. Men who are abusive. Men who are drug addicts. Men who refuse to hold down jobs. Men who walk away from their children, expecting the women to clean up their messes. But everyday he reminds me and proves to me that there are truly good men out there. Men who care about what they are contributing to the world. Men who take care of their families, even if that family only consists of a pretty neurotic wife and a rather lazy golden retriever.

And I thought about my rather mean Uncle who doesn't know me at all. He used to tell my mother that he was positive I would settle for the first loser that looked my way. Ending up divorced, miserable, and desolate.  Even though my uncle is possibly the most cruel person to ever walk the Earth, I can admit that it wasn't a leap of the imagination to think that could happen. I didn't have much self esteem, and I had nothing but a model of bad relationships in my life. But I am proving him wrong every single day. I love that about me. I love that about us.

In that moment in the car, I realized I don't tell him all this enough. It is so easy to keep those feelings to myself, even though they are important to share, because I get caught up in the monotony of the work week. So I told him what I was about to say might be cheesy and he might want to roll his eyes, but I was going to say it anyway. And I did. And we had a great moment.

I just knew 2011 was going to be our year.